Todd is an absent-minded fellow and forgot to include my singles on this week rundown. Here's my take:

Anastacia - Sick & Tired

From Goth-pop to bhangra bandwagoning in the space of two singles? If Kanye fucking West switched styles that quickly you’d be all over his jock. Lesbians really like Anastacia, and when have you known the sisters to be wrong? 10/10

Libertines - Can't Stand Me Now

You know how the first kid you went to school with that OD’d was always one you didn’t actually give a shit about in the first place? 0/10

Shapeshifters - Lola's Theme

2003:
Dance hit of the summer was: Benny Benassi and the nudey DIY women
Dance hit of the summer should have been: That song from the cranberry juice adverts

2004
Dance hit of the summer was: This, which got old so quick you’d think the song suffered from progeria.
Dance hit of the summer should have been: Lou Reed techno-dance party. 2/10

Rachel Stevens - Some Girls

Would we care more if “The Show” hadn’t already stomped all over this? Possibly, but this just sounds like the usual Richard X-omania “pop genius” cast-off, far too many “clever” ideas half-formed, from a seam mined far too much. 6/10

J-Kwon - Tipsy

Considering we started doing the UK Singles Jukebox less often in order to stop covering the same tracks as our American cousins do in their inferior Singles Jukebox, you’d think that covering J-Kwon in the first week back would be a fucking retarded idea. Not so. J-Kwon was born and bred in the lovely market town of Oundle, the son of an antiques dealer. He later went on to study Classical Architechture at Lucy Cavendish College, Cambridge, where he wrote “Tipsy”, after an evening of punting and Pimms. Absolutely spiffing, old chap. 1/10

Morrissey - First Of The Gang To Die

The only “good” track on old big chin’s self-indulgent cash cow of a last album, an attempt to draw together his two spiritual homes, the Lowry landscapes of his past and the gay Latino scene of his present. People just don’t make 70s radio rock anymore. 7/10