My alternative heading was ‘Morri-ssey, Morri-do’ so everyone got off quite lightly, really. Anyway, he’s back! And he’s going on and on about Englishness again!

Thanks must be extended to the information-hyper-cycle-path-by-the-river for enabling me to hear the KROQ airing of “Irish Blood, English Heart” as if I were an actual real American type person, with an actual real American type radio. I’m not though, I’m a rain-soaked Brit - existing purely on a diet of fish ‘n chips and doffing my flat-cap as I trudge wearily through the industrial streets of our Northern wastelands. By eck, ‘tis glum.

Err... sorry, I appear to have wigged out a bit there. Listening to Morrissey always creates images of old Hovis adverts in my brain-like area. He’s up to his old ‘romantic view of English times past, present and future’ shenanigans, you see. Lyrically, Moz seems to be idealising a kind of fluffy patriotism that switches racist imperialism for .. uh.. kittens, or something. He’s also blaming Oliver Cromwell for the stagnant state of current British politics. I think. Which to me seems somewhat harsh, but it does tend to suggest that Moz is keen to usher in the dictatorial rule of a zombified King Charles I. This is excellent news. Cower before our mighty galleons - they’re stuffed to the crows nest with undead hordes, just like those ones you saw in Pirates of the Caribbean! Britain will rule the waves once again! Huzzah!

Meanwhile, the musical portion of the track blasts along happily in a slightly over-produced kind of way. Someone pressed the ‘large guitar sounds’ button for this one, which is fine and dandy by me. I think I detect a hint of wooshy flange effect too (favourite of giggling schoolboys everywhere.)

I am rather excited. This is Morrissey in encouraging form; lively, loud and longing for an England that can never be.