big budget crime drama written and directed by an ex-cop and starring the two biggest heavyweights of French acting alive today may sound like a mouthwatering prospect, but sadly Olivier Marchal’s extensive TV experience as a writer/actor on numerous police shows has resulted in a bizarre exercise in what he thinks we expect a crime caper to be.

Like so many similar genre outings, it all starts with a pounding electronic soundtrack punctuating the dual scenes of a violent armored car heist and the retirement of a wise old cop, Eddy Valence (Daniel Duval). Unfortunately Marchal and the viewer have seen too many mainstream American police dramas to be able to avoid the immediate knowledge that Eddy is not going to be sipping Pernod on the Cote d’Azur by the closing credits. Usually reliable Daniel Auteuil plays Leo Vrinks, supposed tough senior cop in line for the Chief’s job, who is entrusted with the task of taking down the heavily-armed crew. This annoys his rival Denis Klein (Gerard Depardieu) who also wants the top spot, despite his history of breaking the rules and penchant for drinking entire bottles of whiskey just prior to blowing stakeouts. Klein stumbles into the gang’s hideout waving his gun around just as Vrinks is about to catch them and guess who takes the bullet? Poor old Eddy, just one day from retirement.

Up to this point the film still shows promise, despite the nagging feeling that the Dummies Guide to Crime Movies has been well-thumbed for plot and character devices. It then descends into utter parody. Vrinks foolishly agrees to act as wheelman for an assassin, Klein finds out about it and sets him up in order to leapfrog his old rival for promotion, Vrinks goes to prison, escapes briefly to say hello to his wife (who happens to be Klein’s ex-missus, a wasted plot device), seven years slide by, Vrinks is released and seeks revenge on the man who used to be his friend and the whole sorry affair ends up at an airport, always a bad sign.


There is half a good idea in this movie. The concept of two Inspectors competing to take down the same crooks, with the winner gaining promotion is a good one, which played out over a terse ninety minutes against a bleak Paris Winter would undoubtedly have been memorable. Unfortunately that element of the script is tied up midway through the feature, with the feared gang mostly gunned down before any of their character potential is explored, leaving us with a slow-moving, predictable second half where half-baked notions of loyalty and police ethics are mentioned but never expanded upon in a satisfactory manner.

All of which may have been forgivable had the performances and direction been outstanding, but Auteuil in particular looks constantly uncomfortable in the role and Depardieu acts mostly with his moustache. Marchal’s direction shows skill in the action sequences, making it all the more puzzling that he chooses to forego the excitement at the halfway point in favour of fudged melodrama, with the orchestral score meriting a special mention for its sudden overwrought and unwelcome intrusion.

36 Quai des Orfèvres was nominated for eight César Awards, the French Oscars, including Best Film, Best Director and Best Actor (Daniel Auteuil), which has resulted in a mooted American remake. With a disciplined director and clever casting, this could be a very fine addition to the US crime canon, although there are already so many references to superior American cop movies one wonders what the point would be. 36 Quai des Orfèvres remains a prime example of the sort of film America consistently does better than Europe, so we should have nothing to fear in the event DeNiro and Pacino find themselves facing off once again in what would essentially be Heat 2: Heating Up. Should we?